


All We Got

by Soliloquy (Helix)



Category: Frozen (Disney Movies)
Genre: Afterlife, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Death, Discord: Elsanna Shenanigans (Disney), Elsanna Monthly Contest, F/F, Incest, Resurrection, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:13:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24083386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Helix/pseuds/Soliloquy
Summary: On the day Anna decides to confess her feelings for Elsa, her life is cut short in a terrible car accident. Unable to find peace to move on, her soul gets another chance in our realm to get her message through. Here's the catch: she has two days and two nights to move freely and find a way to communicate with Elsa - lest she be doomed to haunt the Earth as a spirit tormented by regret.
Relationships: Anna & Elsa (Disney), Anna/Elsa (Disney)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 24
Collections: Elsanna Shenanigans Monthly Contests Submissions





	All We Got

**Author's Note:**

> The first chapter was written for the Elsanna Shenanigans monthly contest - prompt: stay. It became clear to me I couldn't write the story I wanted to tell within the set word limit so here is my first foray into an Elsanna multichap.
> 
> No explicit content in this chapter but there will be later on.

There was a voice, calling out her name. A voice that was familiar to her on some level but that she did not recognize at all. Her brows furrowed as her eyes remained closed, trying to get a grip on herself, letting out a shaky breath. Was she injured? Hurt? No… she didn’t _feel_ anything. She opened her eyes to find herself in a small room. It was cozy, for lack of a better word, the soft glow of a warm light embracing the otherwise barren space, but for the bed she was apparently laying on.

“ _Anna…”_

There was that voice again, calling out her name and she looked around for a source, feeling somewhat creeped out, a feeling that was only amplified as she realized she did not recognize the room at all, and as she tried to push herself up on her elbows, the bedsheet slid down pooling at the dip of her waist. She was stark naked, and her long red hair was completely loose.

“What the fuck?” she muttered to herself, hurriedly pulling the bedding back up to cover her now exposed skin, on high alert as she frantically looking for any sign of her clothing. In the immediate she had no clear recollections of what she had been wearing the night before and she felt a little unsteady as she tried to piece back together what had happened - and if she could find any clues to where she was and more importantly, how she had ended up here.

She closed her eyes again, hoping it would help her focus. Why did she feel so unsteady? So… untethered? Her head wasn’t pounding and she wasn’t nauseated. A good guess she wasn’t hungover. Which made sense, as she recalled, she hadn’t been drunk the night before. She and Elsa had gone together to run errands very late in the day after a lazy morning in celebration of Elsa’s arrival in the preceding night. An image in her mind of noticing the sunset’s strangely muted colours against an otherwise drab New England sky as the wet pavement stretched ahead of them. It was coming back to her now - Elsa had her coffee in hand, they had just stopped by the dispensary and Anna was finally working up the courage to tell her sister the _true_ nature of her feelings, the part left unavowed for so long. How many times before had she worked herself up to this instant, only to deflate and let it evade her grasp? But today… today was different.

The memory of the moment was growing crisper now. She had started the conversation, a tone shift as she said Elsa’s name meekly and had cleared her throat. She could picture the way the dulled orange and pink light of the dying sun had radiated against the outline of her older sister’s face. There was nothing else in this world that made her soul quake with the shattering need she felt every time she looked at her. It had come to consume her to a point she could no longer keep the words trapped inside her chest for fear of it growing permanently too heavy, or worse yet, hollow.

Her entire being shuddered as she recalled that instant but it didn’t seem as though she was getting any closer to figuring out why she had woken up in this barren room, naked as the day she was born. She slid her palm against her forehead, fingertips teasing the roots of her hair and was surprised to find it wasn’t hot or damp to the touch. Letting out another sigh, Anna closed her eyes once more trying to remember what had happened after that moment. A skull splitting sound resonated, a frantic car horn followed by the burn of white heat. Screeching of metal and exploding glass. Convulsing as indescribable pain - multiple kinds of pain -crashed over her nervous system, her eyes snapped open and she gasped for air.

“ _Anna…_ ”

“What!?”she snapped, losing patience with the mysterious voice, too shaken by what she had just experienced to care about its provenance any longer.

“Anna. Trying to remember the details will only harm you and could potentially cause irreparable damage to your soul.”

Taken aback, the snark bounced off the tip of her tongue before she could stop it.

“My soul? What is this, Jesus camp?”

The voice didn’t offer a reaction, which for some reason unnerved her.

“Anna, do you understand what happened?”

Fingertips fisting around the sheet Anna was beginning to piece her memories more clearly. They were driving. There had been a crash. She trembled suddenly fearing the worst as she looked around the little room again, as though she hoped there’d be a new clue this time.

“Where’s Elsa?”

Panic was lacing its way into her voice as the emotional part of her brain rushed ahead of the reasoning sector. What the former already knew that the latter was still trying to deny, was that there had been a _terrible_ crash. But that information just wasn’t making sense to her. Something wasn’t adding up.

“Elsa isn’t here. She hasn’t crossed the threshold.”

“What kind of weird- who are you?”

“Anna. You need to recognize what happened to you.”

Frantically, the bedsheets were pulled back. Anna didn’t have a single scratch on her. No IV drips, no monitors, no windows… Just the barren room around her. This wasn’t a hospital. This wasn’t a hotel, or someone’s home. She felt herself drifting away, wishing to be anywhere but here. That unsteady, _untethered_ sensation.

“Anna, it’s time.”

Whenever the voice said her name it rooted her back for a moment and clarified things. She groaned unhappily, still avoiding her thoughts about the unthinkable.

“Why do you keep saying my name?”

“Because you need to remember who you were. Without an identity you will be cast adrift. A soul adrift cannot find peace. You need to accept your passage.”

It was becoming harder to ignore the reality laid bare in front of her, so to speak. Even if she felt a bewilderment at what she was experiencing, and she wondered for a moment if this weren’t all a dream. Or rather, a nightmare.

Her hands curled into fists and she felt her nails bite into the flesh of her palm, teeth sinking into her lower lips as she shook her head in denial. She sobbed once audibly, then her shoulders wracked with the trauma of acceptance, began to shake as she cried so hard no sound came out. Seconds passed, moments coming and going. Time had no meaning here and she was starting to lose her conception of it. The voice remained quiet throughout. Only once the tears stopped flowing did she find herself calming down, and thinking of what had been said.

“I died didn’t I?”

“Yes, Anna.”

She might have vomited had she been made of flesh and bone still. The wave of nausea came and went in the blink of an eye. It was more like the memory her soul had of what she should have felt like, rather than what she actually felt.

“What happened? A car crash obviously, but what happened?”

“Another driver ran through a stop sign. Elsa survived… you were killed near-instantly. It’s time, Anna.”

Anna was now trembling like a leaf, shaking her head in denial. Her voice was tight with emotion.

“No, no please! I can’t go yet! I can’t be here, I-”

“Open the door. Once you walk through it, it won’t matter at all. Your concerns will melt away.”

She stared at the only door. A significant part of her wanted to get up without a second thought and walk through it, as though lulled by the voice and drawn to it magnetically. A small part of her however was jolted each time she heard her name and was adamant about not going anywhere near that fucking door.

But then what? There was nowhere else to go and nothing else to do here. No windows, no other doors. No discernible furniture besides the bed.

“It’s okay Anna, it can take time to accept. In a death so sudden the soul has a tendency to be traumatized.”

Under-fucking-statement.

“What if I don’t go through the door?”

The bed suddenly vanished and she found herself landing on the floor, immediately curling up with her knees to her chest. Modesty seemed like a really odd thing to be worried about but she didn’t exactly feel great about her soul apparently being literally laid bare in this strange place.

“You can remain here for as long as you want, or need to. Or you can go through the door. The choice is yours.”

As much as that small part of her was adamant about staying put, she quickly came around to the evidence that staying here probably wasn’t that much better. She pulled herself up, rising from the floor to her feet and headed towards the door nervously. Stepping in front of it caused it to slide open and she was blinded by white light. She lost sense of where she was, where she began or where she ended. But the voice was still there.

“… it seems you were right, Anna. You have unfinished business.”

“I get to come back to life?”

The hopefulness in her voice would be shattered the following instant.

“No… but your soul cannot be laid to rest and move on if you do not find peace.”

“Find peace?”

“Finish what you set out to do, that which tormented and gnawed at you during your time in this life.”

“But how, if I’m dead and can’t go back?”

“You will have two days and two nights to move freely and complete your mission to move on.”

“And if I fail to do it on time?”

“You will be trapped with limited power, limited ability… likely tethered to a singular place until you can find peace. The more time passes, the less likely you can accomplish this. Some souls remain trapped in the world of the living forever, haunting.”

A wind the force of which she had never quite felt, as though the air was passing _through_ her began to drown out the voice.

“How do I do-“

“Believe, Anna.”

Abruptly as the feeling had started it stopped and Anna began trembling again as she felt the atmosphere around her twist and lurch. Only once did she feel somewhat steadied did she reopen her eyes. This time, her surroundings actually _were_ familiar.

The bedroom walls of her childhood still plastered with some yellowing posters and various mementos of her adolescence instantly brought her a sense of comfort, temporarily forgetting that she was in fact dead. What brought her to reality was her gaze resting on her bed.

A figure she barely recognized was heaped on top of it clutching a hoodie that had belonged to her. One she had worn the night before her death. She didn’t linger on that detail, however. She was too stunned by the sight of bereavement to reflect on anything besides Elsa’s blonde hair in a mess, unkept and sprawled about. The gaunt look of starvation, highlighted by the tear stains on her face.

‘ _Oh, Elsa…’_ she whispered to herself, deeply shocked and overcome with sorrow at the sight of her sister’s suffering, normally so self-possessed. She felt guilty, and heartbroken, barely able to stand the knowledge that they had been ripped from each other so violently. Anger began to rise, resenting the driver that had taken her life and cruelly taken her from the love of her life. The injustice, more than anything was a bitter pill to swallow. It hadn’t been either of their faults. It hadn’t been a mistake or poor judgement or anything. They were paying for someone else’s recklessness. And that, maybe even more than death itself, was painful to reconcile.

Anna stepped closer to the bed, cautiously, unsure how this would play out. Her footsteps made no sound and even as Elsa’s bloodshot eyes cracked open, she saw no reaction from her. Gently, she ghosted her knuckles over her older sister’s but bit her lip when it did not trigger a response. She sighed deeply, realizing this wouldn’t be easy.

Elsa stirred looking down at the hoodie she was holding so close to her chest and nuzzled into it, a quiet sob causing her body to quiver as she breathed in Anna’s lingering scent. This seemed to trigger another bout of sobbing.

“Anna…”

Her soul remembered the feeling of a heart jumping in one’s chest, and a soft warmth overcame her when she heard her name spoken by that voice. It was quickly succeeded by concern however as she noticed the hoarseness.

How much time had passed since her death? Judging by the state of her sister it had to have been certainly far more than just a day or two.

Fuck. How was she going to communicate her message?

She stood there for a moment, tortured, more than anything by the fact she could do nothing to hold her, touch her, comfort her. Rage boiled within her again. She was so close, so close to just _saying_ what she had to tell her. And now she was dead and it was so much harder. She regretted not working up the courage to say it sooner while she was still alive. She felt stupid and small and her fears all seemed meaningless now. The trappings of the living were trivial she realized now. Life could be hard for a million different reasons, and life could be surprisingly easy. Why had she denied herself the opportunity to speak her truth for so long? Literally nothing else mattered now.

Anna stood there miserably and watched as Elsa’s fingertips rubbed lightly against the fabric of her hoodie and her sobs seem to space out, calming down. She closed her eyes, a pained expression on her face as she burrowed further into her younger sister’s former shirt.

“I’m so sorry… I should’ve never made you drive me out to coffee.”

Unbeknownst to her the ghost of her dearly departed stood there, looking horrified. Anna wanted to scream, yell to Elsa that she didn’t make her do anything. That she had been happy to go out and run errands with her, get her supplied together so they could kick back for a few days and not leave the house if need be. It wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault but the driver who had selfishly decided the rules didn’t apply to them, or hadn’t paid attention.

“Why not me? Gods, why wasn’t I the one to die? Why won’t you take me too?”

Anna knew it was the grief speaking. But she also knew that if the positions were revered she’d be saying the exact same thing. Yet still, knowing it meant also being aware of what Elsa felt like now, and it was something shattering to watch the hurt before her. She wasn’t sure how much she could stand seeing Elsa like this and she was hoping she would find a way through to her fast. Perhaps, she thought, at least keyed into her grief like this would mean she’d be more receptive. Even though her older sister couldn’t feel it, Anna began stroking her hair.

“And now… now you will never know just how-I love you. I love you so much. I’m such a fucking moron and now you’ll never know.”

What could she mean by this? Of course Anna knew Elsa loved her. They said it to each other all the time. They showed it to one another, not always with those exact words. Sometimes through gestures. Sometimes through little phrases. Sometimes through actions. _Of course_ Elsa loved her. _Of course_ Anna knew.

“I’m so sorry… I should’ve told you long before. I owed you an explanation- you, you _deserved_ to know why I moved away,” Elsa confessed to what she thought was an empty room. “But now you’re gone and you will never know. I’ve got no one to blame but my cowardice,” she lamented. “I’m despicable,” she spat in clear self disgust. “I was so afraid you’d hate me, that you’d never speak to me again if you knew… It just wasn’t right… But I wanted you, _needed_ you in a way that terrified me.” She drew her knees up a little wrapping around the hoodie. “I would dream of your lips on my neck and my fingertips on the edges of your skin. I would whimper your name quietly, desperately in the darkest hours of the night. I fucking longed for you.”

Anna froze, distraught at what she was hearing, disbelief washing over her, wondering if death had distorted her perception or if Elsa truly was saying, meaning, what it appeared she was.

“I’d give anything… anything for just one last chance to hear your voice again. I don’t deserve to love again, if I could not tell the one person I loved the most in this Universe that I was in love her.”

Any ambiguity left in Elsa’s words made place to crystal clear realization. Anna’s doubts evaporated, and her soul could have screamed with the distress of a banshee before a massacre at the realization Elsa had felt the exact same way she did… that she too had been guarding a terrible secret locked inside her heart. It further fuelled the sentiment of injustice - they were so young. And it hurt, knowing they could’ve been together, knowing they never got to confess those feelings, that love. That they never got to taste the depth of their devotion laced with the hunger of their passion. Now they never would. What sort of sick, cosmic joke was this? Oh if they had known then what they knew now… Regret was amplified by grief, grieving a life, a love they would never get to know, have or share. If only Anna had said something sooner. _If only_. Suddenly she was teeming with a singular purpose.

Screw her allotted time. Forget about two days and two nights. It was no longer enough for her to get her message through. She needed more, she needed to taste what she never got.

Somehow she had to find her way back to Elsa. Somehow she had to find a way to _stay._


End file.
